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1. "A truly appreciative child will break, lose, spoil, or fondle to death
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2. "The quickest way for a parent to get a
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3. "When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice safe playpen. When they're finished, I climb out." ~ Erma Bombeck
4. "Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope." ~ Bill Cosby
5. "You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance." ~ Franklin P. Jones
6. "Few things
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7. "A three year old child is a being
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8. "In the little world in which children have their existence, whosoever brings them up, there is nothing
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Mound Systems Dickens
9. "It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawnmower, snowblower or vacuum cleaner." ~ Ben Bergor
10. "The reason grandchildren and grandparents get along so well is because they have a common enemy." ~ Author Unknown
11. "Like
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12. "The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet." ~ Bill Cosby
13. "Mothers are all slightly insane." ~ J.D. Salinger
14. "The most remarkable thing about my mother is that for thirty years she served the family nothing but leftovers. The original meal has never been found." ~ Calvin Trillin
15. "If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?" ~ Milton Berle
16. "Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare." ~ Ed Asner
17. "Parents are the bones on which children cut their teeth." ~ Peter Ustinov
18.
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